Sunday, 15 January 2012

For Everything There Is A Season.

Sometimes some things have, I think, a natural course to run; a season, a limited life that plays out, fades and then dies. I have been thinking about this a lot today as two events have resonated in my mind.

First, a dear, darling friend of mine has had a  'falling out' with a member of her family and amongst all the sniping and vitriolic texts came the accusation that really hurt. My friend was accused of having  'fads' , of picking people up and dropping them just as swiftly, of having a  'favourite ' for a while and then tiring of them. Of starting some new craze and then becoming disinterested and moving on. Well, I have often been accused of the latter and, once or twice, the former .
The second event was finding that a cherished twitter pal had decided to leave  Twitter. She sent her  'goodbye' and that was that ! I have no idea why, that is her decision and I would not presume to pry. However, it all got me thinking about the transient nature of many things in my life, my butterfly mind and equally fleeting interest in my various hobbies and activities.

Let's look at the second event first: the  Twitter  'goodbye'.  Although I still enjoy interacting with my  Twitter family - for that is how I think of the wonderful people I have found on that  social website - I can understand my  Twitter pal's decision. Occasionally I have felt like pressing the  'Delete' button, after a particularly nasty  DM from some mad person I have inadvertently followed , someone who gets some sort of sick thrill from deliberately upsetting people and using abusive language.  But the  'Block' button and the wonderful support from my  true  Twitter pals has always pulled me back from the brink. However, I do find that, the more followers I have accumulated, the harder it is to keep in touch with everyone ! But I know that my favourite  Twit chums are always there and , when we manage to catch up its always as though I have never been away.Twitter is also a great time waster and I often find I'm so engrossed in a discussion that an hour has passed and I have heaps of work still to do and things do tend to get neglected.   Maybe I will eventually tire of  Twitter, but at the moment it seems highly unlikely !! Twitter seems to still be in season.

So, we come to the first event ; the  sudden mad crazes and equally swift loss of interest ! Well, I am certainly guilty of that behavior ! I have always approached a new hobby with great enthusiasm and thrown myself into it, body and soul.  Paper-crafting is one such hobby. I have a huge  'walk in' cupboard full of crafting supplies that I acquired at an alarmingly rapid rate . I had to have  everything  immediately !!  And now, there it sits......admittedly many years, many completed scrapbooks and hundreds of cards later..... looking at me accusingly because I have temporarily ( I hope ) lost interest. This also applies to my painting ..... my little shed-studio sits forlorn and abandoned...... my tapestry and needlepointe, my knitting and crocheting, in fact dozens of fads and fancies.
However, in my defence, I do find that, although a hobby may lie dormant for months or even years, I do go back to it. Revisit it and once again immerse myself in it and discover new inspiration and enthusiasm and many unfinished projects are , eventually, completed .
Is this some flaw in my character, something in my personality, an unwillingness to  'see things through' ?  Or do I simply have an enquiring mind and a willingness to try new experiences ? I don't know, I could not possibly analyse myself with any accuracy. Do any of you know the answer, are any of you the same ? Does everything have a season ?

I would like to think, however , that I have never done that with people. Never picked them up and then discarded them, but , of course, we all have .  Maybe not intentionally, but just because we have moved on.  School friends often drift apart, we all take different paths and some of those paths lead to the other side of the world and we vow to keep in touch and sometimes we do. But more often than not , new people come into our lives and the old school chums suddenly seem too childish or just too far away.  A lost address, a misplaced telephone number, a divorce or sudden change of circumstances all contribute.
 Then there are the failed love affairs, the casual careless way we treat each other when we are young and foolish. The cruel things we say in the heat of the moment when the once beloved becomes the most hated....or the most unattainable. Things so swiftly said that a lifetime will never mend.
We change jobs and work colleagues forget us and we forget them.  We move house and friendly neighbours are lost.We always promise that it will never happen but people come and go like shadows and precious few stay forever. Some are  remembered with affection,  talked about nostalgically , the  "Oh do you remember that day when Ron, was that his name , and Marie did such and such ?"   and , of course, the  " Hmm, I wonder what old Fred is doing nowadays "  Oh yes, we all let people go . It seems there is a season for people too.

And then there are the constants, the ones who never leave ! Family members, of course, are always there. Even though, sometimes, the relationship is strained and you never see or speak to each other. Family are tied together with heart strings and, love them or loath them, they are a part of you.
But, best of all are the  true  friends.  The ones who do not have a  'Use by' date. The people with whom you feel at home , that share and understand your thoughts before you've even thought of them. That never judge or criticize but will tell you, honestly and with affection , that you are being foolhardy and terribly stupid and then support and love you anyway ! Friends you may never see for months, but when you meet its as though you were never apart. Friends to whom you can turn , in the middle of the night or when they are in the middle of some important task, who will still find time to listen and reassure. In my life I have many, many acquaintances , but I count my true friends on the fingers of one hand. They are the ones I will never lose, they are not just passing fads or some new craze. They are  always  in season and I carry them in my heart.

2 comments:

  1. Another fab Blogg, and I must admit to being a little 'faddy' with crafts etc, but at the time they served a purpose, then circumstances change and something else pops up. I was talking about friends coming and going recently and I have decided that sometime you become friends with people you work with, which when this changes so does the friendship, sometime I think people come into your life for a purpose, and when this is fulfilled they move on. I feel I have had many friends who have gone,, some because I moved after leaving school so lost touch with those, have changed jobs a few times, so same there, then marriage, divorce, each time circumstances change for me, or them, some are lost and some more gained. So I decided that they should be treasured when they are around, and just be glad of what you had when it is over. Otherwise, it could get too depressing!!!

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  2. Such a lovely episode in your blog Rosie. I recognised myself in there, not just the Twitter bit, the butterfly personality. I have so many books, paints, pencils, material and other equipment for decoupage, botanical art, calligraphy, quilting...Anyone need an overlocker?

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